Crunch Time

First of all, i wanted to apologize abt last week, sorry ya'll, had guests, plus no work so no time to really kill on a friday...anyway, its the end of the semester, for teachers it means report cards, for students its crunch time, literally, i just pulled one of my famous all nighters wednesday night, and that wasnt even teh final! so what do finals mean to us, whats the point..well teachers will tell you that finals are there for you the student, for otherwise you would never ever sit down and review everything u learned. and as students we protested" thats not true, we'll do it lishma!"
even the non-jewish teachers in my high school knew what lishma ment. but seriosuly, would you ever pull an allnihgter if it was lishma? if you are really dediacted and freakishly studious then, maybe you would get so pulled into the world of academia that you wouldnt notice the sky get darker and darker and tehn lighter and lighter..but maybe you're just normal and after an hr-two tops you get bored, tired, or in my case my "yashvan" starts hurting after sitting for so long then you wounder around your house looking for something to eat, afterall you need to eat, youre burning serious calories working your brain so hard! who said you couldnt workout and study at the same time? then after you get back to your seat, u'll sit there for another 10-15 mins tops and then, you go to bed, promising yourself taht you'll finish later and somehow later never really happens.a test taht u have to study for that actually counts gets in the way etc. so you see how tests are really impt.
crunch time is when we really push ourselves. its always teh end that is teh hardest. when u workout, the "crunches" are always in teh end, yoiu are pushing youself to the limit in those last few minutes. when u climb masada, the last few steps feel as if they are liteally killing ya! but you know taht you'll make it thru! it may be murder but you feel all that much better when its done!when we go through nisyonos in life, the first steps are usually managable, but then it gets to crunch time, its that 21st push up that really is building your muscle, the first few are just to get u to that point- the test is the crunch,can u perservere thru the pain or do you jsut flop down, and give up? and truly, y do we care? y shud we push thru that pain, u see many pple who arent pushingm jsut floating and they seem happy, they are content with their lives...
My trusty Bridging teh Gap quotes R'Yaakov Weinberg in a quite profound qoute if i do say so myslef:"there is a great difference between an action motivated by an awareness of the consequences that automitcally follow it and an action that is motivated by an awareness of the reactionof Hashem." read that again...digest. now apply. why do we do the things we do, do we just do it without thinking or do we do it as a concsious act in resonse to something that has affected us. do we do mitzvos cuz we know that in the long run it will benefit us or do we do it cuz it wil make Hashem proud, make a kiddush Hashem, bring HIs GLory in the world and somehow curb the inane amnt of tumah in the world. Do we crunch and pull thru cuz its a good idea, cuz it makes sense? or do we crunch for the Sake of Hashem- LISHMA!?