Protection
Those closest to you hurt you the most. It is a simple well known fact. Their words hurt more than anyone else's because they mean more to you. You value what your friend opinion of you. Her approval matters to you. It hurt because you let her words go where no one else's can even begin to dream of penetrating. They say "keep your friends close; keep your enemies closer" right?
The yetzer hara used to be outside of us. It was a separate entity. There was Adam, the trees, the animal and the snake. It was something physical and easily labeled. Then came the chet. Adam ate from the Eitz Hadaat and with it brought the yetzer hara into himself. No longer could we easily turn away from our temptations. We cannot simply lock it away in a closet and throw away the key. It is with us from the moment we are born till the day we die. It is a part of us. Like anything we get used to this intruder living with us. We no longer are so hesitant to share our space with him. After all, he has been with us all this time. He cannot be that bad.
Then he creeps into our thoughts. He tells us " I know you. I know what you need. You need to watch that movie. Its just this one time. You're not feeling well. Just this once." He sounds like me. He is making sense. He has my best interests in mind. I have my best interests in mind. I need this. This is a good idea."
Slowly it is no longer him that's talking. Its me that wants this. The lines and boundaries have been smudged and among the confusion I have lost myself to the will of the yetzer hara.I do not know who I am anymore. I have become my own worst enemy. I can hurt myself more than anyone else. I spend more time with me than anyone else. That means that i know how to manipulate me better than anyone else. If we do not take extraordinary care to separate the Yetzer Hara from myself.. then I will lose myself to it and the other side will have one.
A basic concept in Judaism is that of making fences. All of hilchot muksa are to create a fence around Shabbat, lest we G-d forbid come to desecrate the holy day. We need to make fences in our daily lives and our thoughts to keep the Yetzer Hara in his small closet. We cannot allow him to taint our pure neshama and allow him to define us and our actions.
He is the enemy and he is only as powerful as we allow him to be. We cannot allow ourselves to become our own worst enemy.
How do you protect yourself from yourself?
The yetzer hara used to be outside of us. It was a separate entity. There was Adam, the trees, the animal and the snake. It was something physical and easily labeled. Then came the chet. Adam ate from the Eitz Hadaat and with it brought the yetzer hara into himself. No longer could we easily turn away from our temptations. We cannot simply lock it away in a closet and throw away the key. It is with us from the moment we are born till the day we die. It is a part of us. Like anything we get used to this intruder living with us. We no longer are so hesitant to share our space with him. After all, he has been with us all this time. He cannot be that bad.
Then he creeps into our thoughts. He tells us " I know you. I know what you need. You need to watch that movie. Its just this one time. You're not feeling well. Just this once." He sounds like me. He is making sense. He has my best interests in mind. I have my best interests in mind. I need this. This is a good idea."
Slowly it is no longer him that's talking. Its me that wants this. The lines and boundaries have been smudged and among the confusion I have lost myself to the will of the yetzer hara.I do not know who I am anymore. I have become my own worst enemy. I can hurt myself more than anyone else. I spend more time with me than anyone else. That means that i know how to manipulate me better than anyone else. If we do not take extraordinary care to separate the Yetzer Hara from myself.. then I will lose myself to it and the other side will have one.
A basic concept in Judaism is that of making fences. All of hilchot muksa are to create a fence around Shabbat, lest we G-d forbid come to desecrate the holy day. We need to make fences in our daily lives and our thoughts to keep the Yetzer Hara in his small closet. We cannot allow him to taint our pure neshama and allow him to define us and our actions.
He is the enemy and he is only as powerful as we allow him to be. We cannot allow ourselves to become our own worst enemy.
How do you protect yourself from yourself?
Someone told me ages ago: hypothetically, you should draw a red line around yourself, and that stands for everything that you hold yourself to abide by. When the yetzer hara gets the better of you and convinces you to do something, you've stepped outside of your radius. That's ok- everyone messes up once in a while- as long as your alarms go off that you're outside the red line and you feel uncomfortable about it. The worst thing you can do is widen the circle around you to accommodate the guilty pleasure- justifying, becoming complacent, and lowering your standards to turn the sirens off.
ReplyDeleteSo that's my comment and I'm stopping in to say hey :) I really like how you expressed the ideas in this post.
I believe awareness is key. By simply being aware of the possibility that an impulse or desire may be generated by the yetzer harah, it allows us to actually consider and think through it instead of just acting automatically or subconsciously. Not that constant awareness is easy, but it allows for critical thought instead of impulsive action.
ReplyDeleteCorti- thats a really good idea. Well put!The worst is when we go too easy/too hard on ourselves. Thanks for stoppin in!
ReplyDeleteIsh Yehudi- awareness is key, but i don't think that it is always enough. You may be very aware that you should work out..does not mean necessarily that you will
Yes, you need to be aware of what makes you fall but that’s not enough. What’s important is to know what makes you tick, what the yetzer hara tells you to catch you in his net so that you can fight back.
ReplyDeleteIt’s compared to a battlefield, certain things are way above your realm and you are not even fighting to get to those levels, some things are way below your level (considered conquered territory) and other things are on the battlefield – that’s specifically what you are struggling with.
Every person as an individual has to come up with their own tactics and find what works for them. It starts with awareness – knowing what your struggles are but then you have to come up with a battle plan that works best for you. Each persons plan will be uniquely designed for them because every person is different!
And corti-I really like that thought