Simple Question


I look into the window of my mind
Reflections of the fears I know I've left behind
I step out of the ordinary
I can feel my soul ascending
I'm on my way
Can't stop me now
And you can do the same (yeah)

What have you done today to make you feel proud?
It's never too late to try
What have you done today to make you feel proud?
You could be so many people
If you make that break for freedom
What have you done today to make you feel proud?

Still so many answers I don't know (there are so many answers)
Realize that to question is how we grow (to question is to grow)
So I step out of the ordinary
I can feel my soul ascending
I'm on my way
Can't stop me now
You can do the same 

Its been a while. I know. I have started my rotations. Actually just started my second yesterday. ER. Trauma. Crazy stuff. 

It has been a while since I have actually been proud of myself. Like really proud. PA school is rough on the ego. You never feel quite accomplished  You always feel like you could have done better. Studied harder. Scored higher. 

The first day I diagnosed my first ear infection correctly......one of the happiest, proudest moments of my life. I did good. Ears are really hard..and I got it right! I told everyone I knew that day..and the week after. Once I got that done..accomplished...i was so good, it was exhilarating. I finished that rotation, confident. 

Yesterday, I walked into the Emergency Room. I put on my lab coat, my stethoscope around my neck, my pen light in my pocket..all my jazz..and I walked into trauma. I do not know what the heck I am doing, talk about a deer in headlights. Today, i did a suture..on an actual human being! Im learning. I am asking the right questions..I am proud of myself. and its nice. 

I love this song "Proud" by Heather Small.At the risk of sounding cheesy.. Its so motivating. Everyday i try to ask myself this simple question " what have you done today to make you feel proud?"

Its no secret that I have been less that ecstatic about my spirituality lately. But I just could not seem to muster up the courage to make a change, any change. 

(yeah) We need a change (Yeah)
Do it today (yeah)
I can feel my spirit rising 
(change, yeah) We need a change (yeah)
So do it today (yeah)
'Cause I can see a clear horizon

 But this Rosh Chodesh.. i decided enough was enough.. i made a step, tiny, but a step nevertheless. That night.. i was able to answer the question.

So what have you done today to make you feel proud?

 its takka a good question


Comments

  1. DevorahFebruary 14, 2013 at 11:29 AM

    Wow...that's a loaded question!

    Every day that you can answer that question is HUGE. When we are so caught up in the routine of things, it gets tough. Good for you that you have this awareness and were able to answer this question once. May you be able to answer it many, many times!

    Thank you for spreading this awareness.

    ReplyDelete

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