My T'sha B'av
To state the obvious its been a while. This is the place i go to when i need help clearing my head. Somewhere where i can figure it out. T'sha B'av the saddest day of the Jewish calendar. the day set aside to mourn all the tragedies of our people. We sit on the floor. We don't get dressed up. We stay inside because going outside means facing the sun and other people. I count down the minutes until i can have coffee and listen to music again. This year i decided that i wouldn't listen to A Capella music during the 9 days. Something to maybe mark the days as different. This is also the first time in the past 3 years that I actually made it to Eicha. The last two years i just did not feel well enough. But do i feel the sadness? Do I feel the pain? Are there any emotions running through me? All I can think about is my own drama. My own ups and downs. What will be with my life? There is nothing to distract me from my own thoughts. So I obsess like i have a tendenc