AM Inspiration

GOOD MORNING!  What a beautiful day in the neighborhood. Call it global warming, call it climate change...I love these days that are nothing short of presents, gift wrapped with love from our Father above. It does help that I didn't have school this morning ;) I was lucky to get outside semi-early (830ish) and get a jog/walk in. It was so comforting to just walk in the sunshine. It really is amazing how different we feel when the sun is shining and the sky is clear. Vacation is winding down and the cloud of school and work is looming in the not to far distance. So many people asked me what my plans where for this vacation and for once in my life, i was just happy to stay home. In the past I have whined and complained saying how badly I want to get out of town and do something fun and adventurous. But this holiday season my plan was to enjoy simple pleasures. I stayed home and enjoyed my solitude. I read. Drank. Ate. Slept. It was lovely. and today is the perfect

So...recently in my life... My best-friend got engaged! yes, yes lots of  Mazal Tovs and IMYH by yous...But frankly i am not taking it well. I am not behaving the way a best friend should. It doesn't help that shes miles and miles away so I feel so separated from the whole situation as it is. I wont be there for the lchaim the vort the dress shopping, the shower, the wedding planning, the pre-wedding jitters..I am going to miss all that..not that gives me any excuse. I am simply being a bad friend. I am being unkind, not understanding, selfish, passive aggressive..simply put..I am jealous. not of her...of him. That he gets to be with her and I have to give up my best friend. Yes, she's not ceasing to exist, she's getting married but experience has taught me that a lot of the time there is very little difference between the two. Obviously, this engagement is not about me. Its about her. and its so exciting and so overwhelming all at the same time. Or so I'm told, n

Hello, debbie downer here. seeing as this is the closest thing to a diary I have...here it goes. Its happened. I am the cliche. I am that girl. That girl that is crying because she is 26 and single. I am that girl who looks at everyone else and wonder how it is possible that everybody's got somebody but me ? I see these little teen-boppers..arms flung across each other, snuggling close and looking at each other with such ardor I know i should look away but i cannot. Its pathetic but I'm jealous. I want someone to hold, Someone to hold me. I sound like a broken record but it just seems to get worse with very passing day. It doesn't help that every time I get together girls my age it always come back to the same topic.Dating sucks, there is no one good left...the double standard.. blah blah blah. I was on the train today and it took everything in me not to breakdown into uncontrollable sobs. I am alone. Yes, I of little faith... but the evidence points more and more to

I always post the gloom and doom of my life. Mostly because i just need to vent usually. But I wanted to share the good too. I'm not always a Debbie Downer. I was really touched when a friend of mine who is known to go off the radar for weeks/months at a time called me early this week simply to tell me that she's going to be busy and that she won't be available and to tell me that she was thinking of me...I was truly touched. I also just had a crazy 48 hours. I had to go out of town for a big work event. It was just cool to get outta town for 24 hours, stay at a fancy hotel, have car services picking me up...holding signs with my name on it. I know I know I sound like a country bumkin and I very well may be. It was crazy busy taking care of minutae and I barely got to see any of the hotel but it was awesome to be involved with something so big that impacted so many people.  I managed to sneak away to get some gorgeous shots.  I fin

This is precisely what I've felt like all week!  It all started out on Sunday, well really Friday but that was last week, so ill focus on this week.  Sunday..all i wanted to do was come home from school, crash, grab a beer and just veg out...but I was in dire need to go grocery shopping. and by dire i mean dire! as i left the parking lot, i managed to somehow back into a huge  this left the car i was driving severely dented. Mind you this was not my car, but a family in my area who has taken me in as their own. oh, and their daughter is getting married in a few weeks.  and it turns out..the repair on the car...drum roll please... $900!  that was Sunday.  The rest of the week wasn't as dramatic. Just the run of the mill underlying drama that comes with being friends with girls. and the insanity that is work right now because our BIG EVENT OF THE  YEAR is on Sunday as in three days Sunday..  Oh and my teachers are ridiculous and my roommate is insane

Its that time of year. Gingerbread lattes. Yummy huge Sweatshirts. Cuddling up on the couch with the your special someone. Reading a classic book by the fireplace holding a steaming cup of tea (large glass of red wine) reveling in the coziness of your home. Thanking G-d that you are inside and not out. Shabbat was beautiful. As usual. But outside..outside was disgusting. The howling, biting, wind. The rain...oh the rain. But I braved the weather and went out for all my meals. When I got back to m y apartment, all by my lonesome...I felt just that...alone. Most of the time being single doesn't really bother me. I'm busy. Between school and work there is very little time to think. Just go, go, go. But comes Shabbat when there are no distractions. No cell phone. No music. No work. No studying. Just me alone with my thoughts. Scary. That's usually when it hit me. I am alone. I have no one. There is no one that I can call at 3 in the morning and know without a doubt that t