Self- Defense
So clearly I need therapy. I have a hard time putting my thoughts into actual spoken word. I have a hard time communicating my needs and wants. I have been hurting people I care about because of this. I thought I had hit the jackpot. Someone who came from a similar background to me, who understood the importance of family. Someone who would never, ever, ever make me come out; simply because she never would because of her family and kids. and we had fun. I explored parts of myself with her that I never felt safe to do with anyone else. It was supposed to be a no strings attached, casual thing. But then, it changed. It was not fun anymore. It felt like stress. She just came to tell me that she needs to walk away because I am quite literally making her ill. That I am giving her high blood pressure. She says that my actions have not matched my words. That I said I wanted casual, but acted like I wanted a relationship. She said that she hopes that one day that I will learn to be hones