electric shocks
so my new therapist gave me homework, learning to pay attention and to identify my emotions. turns out that after years of trying to fake being happy, parenting my parents and my siblings, always trying to be brave for everyone- all that is not so great for being able to identifying emotions. i know that i avoid the word "angry" because of its negative connotations. i will say im frustrated but never angry. because angry to me is out of control, red, steam coming out of your ears, evil. i will rarely say i am overwhelmed, because i am the strong one that can handle anything. worried- sometimes, happy ...well i was happy but that has not yet made an appearance in a while. she was saying that the anger was a secondary emotion and that i need to identify the primary emotion. i find that i have a harder time with crying. like a baby- when he/she does not know how to express his or herself , the result is tears. and i feel that i do the same thing. anytime i get overwhelmed