who are we what are we doing?
so many stories this week so many stories..and the ones i remember are only from the past two days..anyways..i dont know if yall follow the news but this monday there was serious rain fall in my fair city and when i was driving home i was goin so slowly cuz i cudnt see infront of me it was that bad..it was as if the heavens had opened and the rain was falling with no end...fine i get home soaking wet - i didnt have an umbrella- the next day im driving listening to the news on the radio when i hear all about teh flood of 2009, it was actualy classefied as a flood schools had closed, homes where under water and unfirtunately ten people had been lost to the flood..the first though that striked me and is probably occuring to you is that on mon-tzom gedalyia- merely hours after rosh hashana- a day when we are juddged who will live who will die who by fire and who by water...the very next day..a flood over took the city homes and schools destroyed higways closed for days..lives lost...it was too strong a message to ignore...
second story..rememeber my bio lab partner from last week? so i was talking to her this week and we were discussing school and studying adn stuff..and she asked me if i was working and im like no just taking classes and thast hard enough for me..cant imagine if ihad to work also..and then she says " well as long as u do it right adn dont get married and pregnant like i did"( shes a cancer survivor and is now going back to school pre-med she has two daughters) so i ask her "arent u happy tho?" she says "am i happy with the two beautiful girls i have?yes..when i look at my life and see that all i did was bring two girls into this world..no i want more.." so then i proceeded to explain that i was originally planning on med school but then took stock of my priorities and decided that really the first thing i want to be is a mother, i wanna raise my own kids and i cant do that while im in med school doing my rotations then 72 hr shifts as an intern and and resident..so she agreed with me..and the whole time i was thinking..nebach she thinks taht she has to prove something to the world to herself so shes goin to med school and then her life is goin to be worthwhile...
this was so antithetical to judaism that it blew me away..we see our roles as mothers..tahst who we are we are the nurturers we are the ones taht take care of the family teh ikeres habayit..its the woman that makes everyone in the family who tehy are..its up to her to set the standards and to maintain them..not one of us wud say " all i did was bring two beautiful girls into this world" that is just not something we wud say..its not how we veiw our priorities..how we make money is a personal choice we make based on our unique situations and talents..but is that how we define ourselves? i hope not..but then teh question is- how do i define myslef? what is it that is truly important to me..do i define myself by my sense of style, by my major, my talents, how long my shemona esrei is? am i defined by level of shmiras halashon? this is a question taht we all have to ask ourselves..who am i? what defines me? what makes me tick? looking at ourselves is sometimes and usually an uncomfortable phenemona cuz then we have to be honest with ourselves and really see who we are not what we show ourselves to be...and sometimes we dont like what we see..its not always so pretty..but then we have this wonderful opportunity this wonderful gift- Teshuva adn the time is now..there is a special adn all we have to do is grab it..all we have to do is utilize the tool Hashem has given us...its not somethin that we can take lightly or ignore..if we dont do teshuva in these last few days if we dont return and identify with our Creator then we are saying we dont care enuf, chas v';shalom taht we dont believe taht well get punished...and taht is not something we want.
the most important part of all of us is our neshama. its the part of Hashem that is inside us..the part that yearns for kedusha and connection with Hakadosh Baruch Hu ..we are jews taht is who we are..we are the Chosen People we stood at Har Sinai and said 'NAASEH V'NISHMA!" it is in our spiritual DNA and it is not somethin that can be easily ignored..it is who we are..and it guides what decisions we make where we go what we listen to what we watch what we wear how we wear what we wear..it is who we are..as Rabbi Brown says "judaism is not a way of life..it is LIFE ITSELF!' it makes up every fiber of our being..it is surging through us and especially as we get closer and closer to kol nidre it shud be flwoing fromo our finger tips to our toes..we are jews! we can never ever ever forget it! the goyim for sure will never forget it or let us forget it..y is it that they remember so easily what it so hard for us to remember?
i have a test scheduled for yom kippur..my teacher told my friend that she needs to bring in proof taht she is jewish so i wnet to shul and asked the secretary for a letter explaining that i am an orthodox jew and can therefore not take the test and when i gave it to her she read the letter and at the bottom where there was the rav's signature she gave a little shiver " ooh its from the rabbi"when was the last time we shivered at the mention of a Rabbi? ur local orthodox one for sure not..maybe maybe a gadol hador...when was the last time we trembled before the Master of the world, Creator of the universe, our Father? when was the last time the mention of Hashem's name made us shake..does it even bother us when we say a bracha by accident..oops we say then we move on..we just said the name of HASHEM! in vain! that shud make some impact..but it doenst ..just like we've become accustomed to our Rav of our shul lehavdil we've unfortunately become used to Hashem, we've seemed to have forgotten what it means that He is TEH MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE! EVERYTHING AND I MEAN EVERYTHING IN THIS WORLD IS IN HIS HANDS! when i heard that those people had died in the flood..it was so ...i dont have the words but it really hit me..this isnt a joke...a flood can happen in a second fires can spread in seconds this world is so fleeting so fast and we just have to hang on and do the best we can..follow His torah and re-connect with Him like never before..the world is literally falling apart ..but we cannot afford to we have to be the most stable we;'ve ever been conneceted like there is no tom..bcz we dont know if there will be a tom..the flood taht hit here..it was beautiful the day before and after we have 80 degree weather now..but families our mourning losses..we dont know what the future holds all we can do is take these days these last few days of elevation and soar higher then ever before!
jump-He'll carry u!
second story..rememeber my bio lab partner from last week? so i was talking to her this week and we were discussing school and studying adn stuff..and she asked me if i was working and im like no just taking classes and thast hard enough for me..cant imagine if ihad to work also..and then she says " well as long as u do it right adn dont get married and pregnant like i did"( shes a cancer survivor and is now going back to school pre-med she has two daughters) so i ask her "arent u happy tho?" she says "am i happy with the two beautiful girls i have?yes..when i look at my life and see that all i did was bring two girls into this world..no i want more.." so then i proceeded to explain that i was originally planning on med school but then took stock of my priorities and decided that really the first thing i want to be is a mother, i wanna raise my own kids and i cant do that while im in med school doing my rotations then 72 hr shifts as an intern and and resident..so she agreed with me..and the whole time i was thinking..nebach she thinks taht she has to prove something to the world to herself so shes goin to med school and then her life is goin to be worthwhile...
this was so antithetical to judaism that it blew me away..we see our roles as mothers..tahst who we are we are the nurturers we are the ones taht take care of the family teh ikeres habayit..its the woman that makes everyone in the family who tehy are..its up to her to set the standards and to maintain them..not one of us wud say " all i did was bring two beautiful girls into this world" that is just not something we wud say..its not how we veiw our priorities..how we make money is a personal choice we make based on our unique situations and talents..but is that how we define ourselves? i hope not..but then teh question is- how do i define myslef? what is it that is truly important to me..do i define myself by my sense of style, by my major, my talents, how long my shemona esrei is? am i defined by level of shmiras halashon? this is a question taht we all have to ask ourselves..who am i? what defines me? what makes me tick? looking at ourselves is sometimes and usually an uncomfortable phenemona cuz then we have to be honest with ourselves and really see who we are not what we show ourselves to be...and sometimes we dont like what we see..its not always so pretty..but then we have this wonderful opportunity this wonderful gift- Teshuva adn the time is now..there is a special adn all we have to do is grab it..all we have to do is utilize the tool Hashem has given us...its not somethin that we can take lightly or ignore..if we dont do teshuva in these last few days if we dont return and identify with our Creator then we are saying we dont care enuf, chas v';shalom taht we dont believe taht well get punished...and taht is not something we want.
the most important part of all of us is our neshama. its the part of Hashem that is inside us..the part that yearns for kedusha and connection with Hakadosh Baruch Hu ..we are jews taht is who we are..we are the Chosen People we stood at Har Sinai and said 'NAASEH V'NISHMA!" it is in our spiritual DNA and it is not somethin that can be easily ignored..it is who we are..and it guides what decisions we make where we go what we listen to what we watch what we wear how we wear what we wear..it is who we are..as Rabbi Brown says "judaism is not a way of life..it is LIFE ITSELF!' it makes up every fiber of our being..it is surging through us and especially as we get closer and closer to kol nidre it shud be flwoing fromo our finger tips to our toes..we are jews! we can never ever ever forget it! the goyim for sure will never forget it or let us forget it..y is it that they remember so easily what it so hard for us to remember?
i have a test scheduled for yom kippur..my teacher told my friend that she needs to bring in proof taht she is jewish so i wnet to shul and asked the secretary for a letter explaining that i am an orthodox jew and can therefore not take the test and when i gave it to her she read the letter and at the bottom where there was the rav's signature she gave a little shiver " ooh its from the rabbi"when was the last time we shivered at the mention of a Rabbi? ur local orthodox one for sure not..maybe maybe a gadol hador...when was the last time we trembled before the Master of the world, Creator of the universe, our Father? when was the last time the mention of Hashem's name made us shake..does it even bother us when we say a bracha by accident..oops we say then we move on..we just said the name of HASHEM! in vain! that shud make some impact..but it doenst ..just like we've become accustomed to our Rav of our shul lehavdil we've unfortunately become used to Hashem, we've seemed to have forgotten what it means that He is TEH MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE! EVERYTHING AND I MEAN EVERYTHING IN THIS WORLD IS IN HIS HANDS! when i heard that those people had died in the flood..it was so ...i dont have the words but it really hit me..this isnt a joke...a flood can happen in a second fires can spread in seconds this world is so fleeting so fast and we just have to hang on and do the best we can..follow His torah and re-connect with Him like never before..the world is literally falling apart ..but we cannot afford to we have to be the most stable we;'ve ever been conneceted like there is no tom..bcz we dont know if there will be a tom..the flood taht hit here..it was beautiful the day before and after we have 80 degree weather now..but families our mourning losses..we dont know what the future holds all we can do is take these days these last few days of elevation and soar higher then ever before!
jump-He'll carry u!
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