Live Like You Were Dying
On Sunday morning i was in the car and i was listening to the radio..and they annouced that they were sad to announce that Royal Marshall had passed away that weekend and then went on to list the details of the memorial service. Who is Royal and why do i care? Royal was a member of the crew of a political talk show that i listened to here and there. Royal was 43 when he suffered from a massive heart attack and was dead before he hit the ground.
It does make you stop and think. When we got to bed in the evening we assume that we will wake up. We don't go to bed making tearful goodbye to all our loved ones lest we don't arise in the morning. We know our neshama goes up to regenerate and recharge at night..but we assume that it will return to us in the morning and life will go on.
We make plans for the future. When we wake up and go to work..we think about what we are going to do when i get home...we go to the gym..we sleep in late..we don't sleep at all..we basically live our lives without giving much thought to the fact that our lives are on loan. We do not get to control when we come and when we go. Yet, we seem to ignore that little fact and live life the way we do..
I have this vivid memory of when i was in 7th grade and a girl in my class came up to me and looked me in the eye and asked me in all seriousness..."what if i don't wake up tomorrow?!" and i had nothing to answer her! I couldn't say don't worry, of course you will....how was i to know? Who knew if she would indeed wake up the next day?
It is a mitzva to say vidduy the day before he dies..but how does one know when his passing will be? It could be any moment..So we are supposed to do teshuva every moment just in case. Tim McGraw has this song that gives me chills every time i hear it...(in general i don't listen to non-Jewish music but this song is an exception)
So my question is as follows.. It sounds really nice to live like you were dying and to make this the best day ever cuz what happens if tom doesn't...but then you would never make any plans...cuz if you knew that this was your last day on this earth...
- you wouldn't go to school
- you wouldn't go to work
- you wouldn't work out
- you wouldn't sleep
-you wouldn't study...
the list goes on and on..so how does it play out logistically?
How can you live a full life and still plan for the future? Is it something to strive for? to live like you were dying? Or is it something that just sounds pretty but doesn't really make sense if you think about it?
(here's what i think..i think that in terms of spiritual concerns we should live as if today was our last..so that in case we are struck down by lightening and we aren't prepared..we aren't embarrassed..don't do anything that you may have to go back and fix later bcz the later may never appear. But in terms of worldly matters..in terms of being a physical being we have to think about the long term.. i.e. eating healthy and exercising... but that's just my opinion and want to hear from y'all)
It does make you stop and think. When we got to bed in the evening we assume that we will wake up. We don't go to bed making tearful goodbye to all our loved ones lest we don't arise in the morning. We know our neshama goes up to regenerate and recharge at night..but we assume that it will return to us in the morning and life will go on.
We make plans for the future. When we wake up and go to work..we think about what we are going to do when i get home...we go to the gym..we sleep in late..we don't sleep at all..we basically live our lives without giving much thought to the fact that our lives are on loan. We do not get to control when we come and when we go. Yet, we seem to ignore that little fact and live life the way we do..
I have this vivid memory of when i was in 7th grade and a girl in my class came up to me and looked me in the eye and asked me in all seriousness..."what if i don't wake up tomorrow?!" and i had nothing to answer her! I couldn't say don't worry, of course you will....how was i to know? Who knew if she would indeed wake up the next day?
It is a mitzva to say vidduy the day before he dies..but how does one know when his passing will be? It could be any moment..So we are supposed to do teshuva every moment just in case. Tim McGraw has this song that gives me chills every time i hear it...(in general i don't listen to non-Jewish music but this song is an exception)
So my question is as follows.. It sounds really nice to live like you were dying and to make this the best day ever cuz what happens if tom doesn't...but then you would never make any plans...cuz if you knew that this was your last day on this earth...
- you wouldn't go to school
- you wouldn't go to work
- you wouldn't work out
- you wouldn't sleep
-you wouldn't study...
the list goes on and on..so how does it play out logistically?
How can you live a full life and still plan for the future? Is it something to strive for? to live like you were dying? Or is it something that just sounds pretty but doesn't really make sense if you think about it?
(here's what i think..i think that in terms of spiritual concerns we should live as if today was our last..so that in case we are struck down by lightening and we aren't prepared..we aren't embarrassed..don't do anything that you may have to go back and fix later bcz the later may never appear. But in terms of worldly matters..in terms of being a physical being we have to think about the long term.. i.e. eating healthy and exercising... but that's just my opinion and want to hear from y'all)
Shavua tov!
ReplyDeleteWow, very powerful words and great post. And your answer is right on the mark -- we need to LIVE and constantly have the concept of "shiviti HaShem l'negdi tamid" on our minds.
It seems that, for the most part, the secular understanding of "live today like it's your last" is -- be happy! have fun! be crazy! hakunah matata...don't worry about anything. don't sweat the small stuff.
The "bucket list" consists of: go bungee jumping, go parasailing, visit as many countries as possible, drink rare & expensive alcoholic drinks, etc.
Ezeh shtuyot!
Our "bucket list" is completely different. Judaism's view of "live your day as your if it's your last" is basically: strengthen your relationship with HaShem and His children. Pray, do chessed, help people, learn as much Torah as you can, smile, give tzedaka, TESHUVA, etc. It's all based on giving and working on our neshamot -- our true essence and self! Not, chas v'shalom, being selfish and materialistic.
What a zchut it is to be part of the Am Segulah!
Gut Voch!
ReplyDeleteA number of things. There is a chassidic story with the same concept. The exact details of the story slip my mind right now, but the idea is that one of the previous Chabad Rebbeim was once traveling, and he stopped by a certain inn. Inside, he met a Jewish youth who had unfortunately strayed from the Torah path. He told him something (it slips my mind what, but I assume it was something about like "remember who you are sort of thing") and left. that night the youth was preparing for bed, and as was the custom of the "in" people who had their hair made up in a special way, they would put their hair in a special case for when they went to sleep so it wouldn't get messed up over night. The youth did that, and lay down. As he was lying in bed, the thought entered his head, that what would happen if he would G-d forbid die in middle of the night, and the chevra kaddisha would come to bury him in the morning, see the case for his hair and stand there laughing at him! the thought drove him so crazy that he did teshuva and became a frum Yid. So just a nice story of that concept: )
About saying vidduy before you die, etc. Actually some nuschaos do say vidduy at night in krias shema. I daven nusach ari, and we say Tachnun in krias shema, and it is customary to say vidduy (at least occasionally)as well. For example, I say it generally one night a week.
You cannot live your life constantly worrying about dying etc. You have to worry about your mission at hand. The thing Hashem placed you into this world to do. Yes, you have to keep in mind that the day will come when you will stand in front of a panel of judges, but that is not for you to constantly think about. You have your avodah to do now, and if you do that properly (or try to do your best), you've got nothing to worry about!
I sorta had this thought recently... And truth be told... We are on the brinks of death every day... Like this quote I came up with, "I have the symptoms for death-- it's called life."
ReplyDeleteWe don't know, we can't plan, and G-d doesn't want us to "eat drink and be merry, for tomorrow we may die."
I asked a teacher recently, "if we are here to get closer to G-d... why don't we just commit suicide and be next to him in a second?"
But.. that's not the point... the idea is to live our lives in this world... while realizing there is another one we are destined for...
It's late... and that's my ramble...
Gut voch.
Also check out, When The Sand Runs Out by Rascal Flatts :)
ReplyDeletePrimum Non Nocere: Boat Trip Memories
Now that I'm a bit more awake I checked up the story, and I have a few corrections. First, the story was not with one of the Chabad rebbeim, it was with Reb Moshe Leib of Sasov. Second, what happened was that Reb Moshe Leib met this young fellow, and told him that if he does teshuva all his transgressions will be transformed to merits. The youth answered, if so, I may as well sin more so that I can accumulate more merits. That night...
ReplyDeleteSorry for the mistakes!
Sefardi girl- yes we have our priorities..we have a better focus..but that does not stop me from wanting to travel the world and go para-sailing..
ReplyDeleteProfessor- I daven aidut hamizrach and we say vidduy in kriat shema as well..which is a good minhag to have in case we dont make it to the morning. We cannot live morbidly always thinking that today is goin to be teh day we die..but it is a good reality check to think that it is possible..
Racheli- Chas V'shalom we shouldnt ask for death ever..we can get close to Hashem in this world by doing His will..every day we live is one day closer to our death..but it is also one day closer that we get to being in Olam Haba..
PNN- i read the lyrics..they are beautiful thanks for the recommendation
Proffesor- thanks for the corrections...we are all entitled to our mistakes..
Ah, never never! It was a concept I was struggling with, a theoretical wondering that I needed clarified...
ReplyDeleteEvery second of life is so precious. I know first hand, so C"V!!
This morning, when I was saying my daily yom of tehillim, I read perek 23. When I said "Gam ki ailech bigay tzalmaves" I thought of this post.
ReplyDeleteTaking the perek a bit out of context, but I was thinking how we have to know, that "we walk in the shadow of death". Meaning that Hashem can chose to end a life suddenly. Nevertheless "Lo ira ra" Vishavati bvais Hashem lorech yamim". You got to not worry. You got to take care of doing your work in this world and forget about all the other stuff that disturb u from achieving ur goal.
Disclaimer: This is my own "momentary take on it", and not an interpretation I have seen anywhere. So if you dont like it feel free to disagree.
Racheli-its a valid question theoretically its intersting to contemplate...as long as it stays in theory..hmm theres a topic in itself..thanks..
ReplyDeleteProfessor- i like your take! we have to make Torah our own and make it applicable in our lives..this is a great way!
This is truly one of the hardest questions to answer in Life.
ReplyDeleteBasically, what it all comes down to is that we should do whatever it is that makes us truly happy. Find what that is and do it as often as we can.
If we are not happy then there is not much else we can do. Any good we can pass on to the rest of the world must first come from our own happiness.
Thanks for the thought-provoking post and keep Livin' Life!
Welcome to the blog...it is important to live life with passion and to quote dolly parton
ReplyDelete"find out who you are and then do it on purpose"
live should be filled with meaning and joy..i agree that the happiness shouldn't be superficial rather a deep happiness that pervades all your senses not just a momentary high. Usually it is the spiritual joys that have real existence and real substance that stand the test of time.
Last night I was speaking with some friends, and this topic came up. One of them reminded me, that when we were in yeshiva, shiur bais (10th grade), our dorm counselor suddenly developed a pain in his eyes and began having a hard time seeing. He went to the doctor and was old that he has a rare tumor, and R"l has a month to live. Two weeks later he was B"h told that it was a mistake and it was something that they could take care of. I remember him telling us later, the way he sat down when he got home from the doctor, and wrote out a schedule, down to the minute of how he would spend his last month of life. He told us, how he now appreciates every moment of life to such an extent being that he had such a close scrape with death.
ReplyDeleteI think that's what it means to live like your dying. To try to appreciate everything you have and try to accomplish as much as you can in the "time left". The idea is to try not to waste time, live the moment instead of worrying about the end. ( The guy told us, that during the whole ordeal, he wasn't constantly thinking about the end, he was thinking about the now.)
Life On A Cotton Ball: Celebrations
That is a serious wake up call! Talk about a second lease on life..
ReplyDelete